Dear Mom,
I just wanted to take the time to write you this letter and let you know how grateful I am for all of the help that you have given me over the years. From the moment I was conceived you were my life line. As a mom myself I know how huge of a responsibility that is and how tough a job mentally, physically, and emotionally. You did it times five! You have always been there for all of your kids. Sometimes that meant some huge sacrifices and some heart breaking realities. Especially dealing with all you have had to endure as Robyn has not been easy. Your example in what you lived through has helped me get through what I have had to endure. For that I can’t thank you enough because it isn’t easy at all. Something you never really understand until you have lived it yourself.
If I really was able to talk about all the times you helped me, we would be sending this letter to the publisher, so I am just going to give you one string on the helper that has been you.
I haven’t always been that person that couldn’t resist touching that stove to see if it is really hot. My problem was I was the biggest sneak in the world and so dang good at getting away with it. This isn’t always good because as we all know good and well one bad choice leads to another and then another and another and so forth until you look and all around you all you can see is a big dark hole. You hate yourself and you don’t know how you can get out of it. You lose your hope. You lose the will to find your hope. It was you mom, you made me realize that was what I had lost. I was lying on my couch physically, spiritually, physically and mentally, tired of my life and where it had taken me just not wanting to be alive anymore and you told me why it hurt so bad. Cause I had lost my hope. But you mom, you never lost your hope in me. You never stopped getting on your knees and praying your heart out for your baby girl. That she would find her way. That she would learn to love herself and see herself for the person that she truly is. You kept the hope until I could find it and I started stepping up as the dirt kept getting thrown on me. One step at a time you held my hand in whatever way you could. Each time more dirt would get thrown on me you were there in some way helping me step up. Be it coming to my rescue when Tyler was born; when I lost Alexis you were there and helped me get through that pain and hurt. Each promotion at worked each positive goal met through all that dirt, you gave me the help I needed to keep pushing through. You taught me to learn how to love me. You stepped back and let me fall when I needed to, but you were always there to grab me when I reached out for your arms. You are the true example of a mothers love because you have done that with all of your children in all of the trials they have been through. I can’t imagine that has been easy in any way and I can’t imagine the sleepless nights when your children weren’t safe and you worried. When they hurt and you couldn’t make it better, but just had to have faith and not just faith for you but for us too. You kept hope alive for me until I could find it for myself. That is a remarkable accomplishment in my mind and one that I am so very grateful for and I keep with me everyday. Even when things are tight and tough and lonely and I start to feel sorry for myself, I know I can always call you and you can bring Robyn over and I can feel a little more hope!
I love you very much mom, and I am so grateful for the mother you have been to me, the friend you are to me. Your faith and your love is how I have gotten through. You made me and you saved me and for that I am eternally grateful.
Your loving girl,
Melinda
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